advice/  advice for male subs

Submissive man seeks casual play partner

18 Comments

Ten days ago, my sweet friend Peroxide placed a personal ad in location-specific groups for a female dominant. He is looking purely for casual play.

Charming young sub, seeking casual play partner

Hi, I’m Peroxide, I write Submissive in Seattle and I’m looking for a nice lady to be my casual play partner.

I don’t do sex or D/s outside of a LTR, so this would just be a Top/bottom thing.

I’m not terribly experienced, but I am masochistic and eager to have a good time, so if you are a Domme/top/sadist and want a nice male body to tie

… Continue Reading
Loves: 12
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advice/  musing/  my boy

Inexperience is hot

9 Comments

I don’t seek out inexperienced submissives, nor do I like submissives *because* of it, but I do love inexperience. It is fresh and sweet and innocent.

When I bring an inexperienced submissive with me into a kind of relationship that he has never been in before, I get to see everything with fresh eyes, as if it’s the first time for me also, and in so many ways, it *is*. I get the incredible privilege of being part of his exploration, I get to watch him as his world expands, I get to see a man who has ‘been there … Continue Reading

Loves: 22
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advice/  advice for Dommes

How to be demanding

68 Comments

I’m going to try really hard not to get all ranty-mcranty here, but I can’t promise anything.

I’m only going to tackle one tiny piece of this because this is a slice of the ‘not dominant enough’ pie, which is as big as the entire world, it seems.

New dominant women exploring D/s relationships often struggle with ‘demanding things’ from their submissive. They don’t know how to do it, and it often makes them feel bad. There are really two main reasons for this:

1. They feel selfish and this makes them feel guilty and
2. There is an assumption … Continue Reading

Loves: 34
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advice

BDSM references

17 Comments

In some quarters of the BDSM world, there is a penchant for references.

A lot of newbies are advised to ask potential D/s partners for references, and if they can’t provide any, that’s a red flag because anyone trustworthy will have ex play partners who can tell you all about them. And if they don’t have any exes who can provide references, it’s probably because THEY KILLED THEM ALL!!!

It’s ridiculous.

If you have mutual friends, that’s something different. That’s a pretty normal part of social interaction: “Hey, I’m going out with Dave next week, you know him, right? Good … Continue Reading

Loves: 20
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advice/  advice for Dommes/  sex toy review/  toys

Which strap-on harness?

79 Comments

I mentioned in this post that I have two strap-on harnesses. I’ve since had a few women ask me which they are and what I think of them, so I thought I’d write a post to talk about it.

Firstly, I have to stress that I am not some sort of pegging ‘expert’: I have no special knowledge or insight, and I really haven’t tried a lot of harnesses. I’m just sharing my experience in case it’s useful, and I’m hoping you will share yours also.

When I first wanted to try a strap-on, I had a single aim with … Continue Reading

Loves: 5
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advice/  advice for male subs/  Pilot

Profile: From ‘no’ to ‘oh yes please’

17 Comments

With all the talk of profiles that is always going on, and my ‘No, bad profile, bad!!’ thing, I have permission from the lovely man who prompted this post to show you ‘before’ and ‘after’.

He turned up on my ‘who’s viewing me’ list on CollarMe, so I went and took a look at his profile. It looked like this:

BEFORE:

This boy needs to learn who comes first.

Although he’s a successful and professional alpha male in public, the boy acknowledges that he has always felt happiest when dreaming about serving a worthy lady. He knows that he has … Continue Reading

Loves: 6
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advice/  advice for male subs/  play

How to beg

33 Comments

I was a huge huge fan of Bitchy Jones’s Diary. Her blog is still on my blog roll even though she stopped writing there (and removed a lot of her content) in February 2010  *sad face*. But I just discovered that I saved a couple of my favourite posts… wheeee!!!

I am really not so big on begging because it has to be sincere and believable to work for me, and most men can’t pull it off. But Oh. My. Fucking God.  When it’s done right… Guh.

This was an email that Bitchy Jones got from her submissive, … Continue Reading

Loves: 4
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