Shit Ferns says #7

Random things, no context.

I’m piloting that potpourri right into a herd of puppies!! THIS IS YOUR FAULT!!

And no, really, a cock is a boy-handle, if you want to get technical

Vs dressed up as if your partner is a box of stupid and everyone wants to own the box of stupid

Because the internet is all your fault? THAT’S RIGHT!!!

It will be done in your blood, natch, which must be blessed by a true Domme (that would be me) and pissed on by virgin unicorns (that’s your responsibility).

…I’m all about the cocks, if a man refuses

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Loves: 8
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Eeek! Blog chat

I’ve discovered that a plugin that I use here on my blog allows me to initiate a chat with someone when they are reading my blog.

Ferns chat request

This amuses me greatly because if it happened to me on someone’s blog, it would FREAK ME THE FUCK OUT!! I think I would get such a shock that I would click the little x at the top of the screen so fast my head would spin.

Poll is closed – results below.

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Loves: 25
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Bedoodled

I was trying to figure out what I wanted to talk about with you good folks, what I was in the mood for, and nothing quite fitted right.

Then I was chatting with my friend Captain Andy, who was having a beer, with his doodle pad nearby. I asked him to send me a doodle, and five minutes later, I had this.

I laughed so hard, I had to share it.

 

Ferns with champagne

 

Oh, how I wish!… Continue Reading

Loves: 16
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Come and sit in on a chat with me…

© Masocast by UnspeakableAxe

Do you want to sit in on a chat with me? Pretend we are in a bar, having some champagne, and having a cosy little chat? You can, sort of!

Unspeakable Axe and I talked for nearly three hours when he interviewed me for Masocast. His interview style is lovely, so it’s a low key, casual, friendly chat where we cover a whole range of topics.

He then had to trawl through my ramblings to edit it down to about an hour and twenty minutes (nice work, Axe!).

Over an hour of me talking!!! I KNOW, IT’S TOO MUCH!!!Continue Reading

Loves: 15
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Shit Ferns says #6

Random shit I spewed out at people.

No zing zing with the pussy pussies!

I will practice a gloat-covered sheepish victory dance

If someone says ‘you are too nice’, they are trying to avoid saying ‘you are boring and have no genitals’.

I am liking leaf number three, leaf number three is obviously superior to leaves number one or two, though they tried their hardest and deserve a little pat for their sub standard efforts. But leaf number three will be my favourite. Leaf number four will have to work hard to outdo leaf number three!!

Because one woman’s girlie

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Loves: 7
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Why you should be on twitter too…

One of the reasons I’m on twitter is exchanges like this, which are totally and utterly happy-making:

I’m up early… I don’t like this. I don’t like it one bit!!

@Ferns__ You’ll take it and you’ll love it!!

@iBreedBySpores *kicks you in the shins… cackles*

@Ferns__ That kind of day, huh? *tickles, pinches, sticks finger up nose, smacks in the face*

@iBreedBySpores *laugh* You realise I totally imagined you doing that stuff to yourself for my amusement… that’s what you meant, right?

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Loves: 7
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Sunday afternoon

I was feeling a little ‘meh’ today.

I invited my vanilla ex out for an afternoon drink at the surf club where we can sit overlooking the beach.

Pinot grigio, idle conversation, humpback whales just off shore, a volleyball game with good natured kids going on just under the deck.

Whales! Seriously. Just off shore. I am so fucking lucky!!

All of this makes me happy.

I watch a boy playing volleyball below the deck where I am sitting. He is thin, he wears oversized sunglasses, long board shorts, a t-shirt, chin hair with no moustache. He is compelling. I … Continue Reading

Loves: 17
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