“If you are a slave in robes, if all you desire is to bend to the will of men, if you have no experience as a dominant personality, then you CANNOT handle me. You have been warned.”

See, I *should* find that profile text silly and petulant and childish.

But, I don’t. At all.

It amuses me, makes me smile. I find it interesting, intriguing, truthful, with an arrogance that is strangely appealing. This is a man who has had some disappointing experiences, one who is strong and confident, one who will not allow himself to be walked over, one … Continue Reading

I have been having some discussions recently about specific things that could be interpreted either as testing trust or exercising control. The act is the same, the intent is not.

If you are exerting control because you don’t trust your partner, you have a problem.

Let me say it again…

If you are exerting control because you don’t trust your partner, you have a problem.

Not a little one either, a big huge gigantic problem.

• Are you putting him in a chastity device to stop him cheating on you?
• Are you asking for his email or kink site passwords because

Since finding myself single, I have worried a little about how this blog will influence the impression potential submissives have of me. It is not that this is not the ‘real me’, and in fact one of the loveliest compliments I received from my boy was ‘you are exactly how you come across in your writing’… I am gratified by that, a little relieved to know that I didn’t create this ‘persona’ for myself, happy to know that this is not misrepresenting me, glad that this is not a picture of how I *wish* I was, or how I *want … Continue Reading

I have had, largely, a bad year… that is dramatic and ‘woe is me-ish’, but it’s true nevertheless. Some of it I have shared here, some of it I haven’t because, frankly, whining and carrying on is no fun… mostly it is not interesting to write about and I have no doubt that it is not interesting to read about.

I use this blog as a way to take a moment out of the mundane and to bring into the light those snippets that strike me outside of the day to day. They are not always shiny happy moments, but … Continue Reading