I’m good at remote communication. Probably better than in-person. I can write thoughtful, funny, intimate emails. I adore someone who does the same, who fires me up, who is able to bring something to our exchanges that makes me excited and fascinated, that feeds me. That thing where I can’t hit reply fast enough: I need that.

I’m also good at doing long distance. I seem to do it a lot. Not because it’s a thing I choose as such (though self-examination makes me wonder about this), but because the men I really like seem to have an annoying habit … Continue Reading

All going to plan, the cougarling will arrive here on Saturday afternoon after a million hours of driving. He will stay for a few days (not with me: that’s waaay ‘too much too soon’). How long exactly depends on how it goes.

I sent him an outline of my expectations:

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What I expect from the visit is that we will date like normal people dating, though obviously we will be spending far more time together than would be usual because you aren’t local so we don’t have the luxury of catching up once or twice a week over a … Continue Reading

I rarely talk about potentials here for a bunch of complicated reasons.

Firstly because they usually know about my blog and talking about my feelings while exploring something new is confusing and destructive. If I write about it honestly, it’s more information than I am ready to share with them. Since these things are always tenuous and volatile, my thoughts are often all over the place, and blurting them out when they are fleeting and changeable can cause all sorts of confusion and hurt.

Secondly because conversations that have the potential to turn into something have pretty much equal potential … Continue Reading